For a long time, I thought I understood pressure.
I thought it was something external.
Deadlines. Decisions. Responsibility.
Things you could point to.
But what I didn’t realise was how quietly it can show up.
Pressure doesn’t always arrive in obvious ways.
Sometimes it builds slowly.
Through uncertainty.
Through responsibility that doesn’t switch off.
Through carrying things you don’t always have the space to process.
And over time, it starts to show up in places you don’t expect.
Not just in your work —
but in your body.
In your energy.
In your thoughts.
For me, it showed up physically.
I gained weight.
Not overnight. Not dramatically.
But gradually — without really noticing at first.
And when I did notice, I didn’t immediately connect it to what I was carrying.
Because we don’t always link stress to how we feel in our bodies.
We push through.
We keep going.
We focus on what needs to be done.
At the same time, life doesn’t pause.
You’re still a parent.
You’re still present for your family.
You’re still showing up for your responsibilities.
And in many ways, that becomes the priority.
Not how you feel —
but what needs to keep moving.
There’s also a layer of this that people don’t talk about.
The internal conversation.
The way pressure can affect how you see yourself.
You remember who you used to be.
The version of yourself that felt lighter.
More in control.
Less weighed down by responsibility.
And you start comparing.
Even if you don’t say it out loud.
But life changes you.
Motherhood changes you.
Leadership changes you.
Responsibility changes you.
And the truth is — not all change is visible in the way people expect.
Some of it is internal.
Some of it is carried quietly.
This isn’t about losing yourself.
It’s about recognising that growth doesn’t always feel like progress.
Sometimes it feels like pressure.
And sometimes that pressure shows up in ways you don’t immediately understand.
I’ve learned to be more aware of that.
To recognise what I’m carrying — not just externally, but internally.
Because if we don’t acknowledge it, it doesn’t disappear.
It just shows up differently.
This is part of the reality we don’t speak about enough.
Not just what we’re building.
But what it’s doing to us while we build it.
And maybe the more we become aware of that…
The more we can move through it with clarity.
— Joice Motref